Can I Have Some Anxiety With Motherhood Please

Wouldn't it be so nice to pick and choose what we wanted to come with Motherhood?!
Oh, I'd love extra kisses and snuggle time, but can you go easy on the tantrums, whining, and the tattling?
I'd really appreciate double patience, understanding, nice voices and kiddos who sleep through the night as early as 4 weeks,
Give me playground dates where no one gets hurt,
a bath tub that never produces bumps and bruises (those silly water spouts seem to always get the best of us),
a doctor's appointment where we leave with stickers/ coins for the "gumball machine" (it actually houses balloons and toys, not gumballs!) for the kiddos and a high- five for mommy,
an outing where all the children/ parents are friends and no one is left out,
a classroom to grow and use their minds with teachers that encourage and help buld strong characters,
and I'd love to help pick their buddies,
I'd make sure they were as loyal and as fabulous as Buzz and Woody or Barbie and Ken!


Please hold the anxiety...
Wait, anxiety is part of it all.

We aren't experiencing any major trials right now, but I keep waking up through the night with nightmares where something bad is happening to one of my babies. I am not able to figure out whch one of my kiddos is in danger, but this terrifies me. As soon as I am about to see which kiddo is in trouble, I wake up. Also, I am unable to recall waht is happening to my precious child. This has been causing me restless crazy nights and fear during the days. When I wake up at night, I always say a prayer my babies will be happy, safe, and with no hurt feelings, and it is only after my prayer is said that I can fall back to sleep! With that being said, I wanted to post this to help remind me that motherhood is never easy, I feel it is probably our toughest challenge we will endure while in this Earthly state.

"Do not pray for tasks equal to your abilities, but pray for abilities equal to your tasks. Then the performance of your tasks will be no miracle, but you will be the miracle."-President Thomas S Monson

Yes, we ARE still alive!!!!!!!!

It has been a long time FOREVER since I've updated everyone on our chaotic lives, I don't have much time to be online these days! This past year has been a little difficult for us, but at the same time we KNOW we are VERY blessed! Heavenly Father loves us more than words explain, He gives us great strength, and guides us in everything we do! Recently, our faith was tested and we, as a family, were shaken greatly when Aaron's father, LeRoy, retutned to our Father in Heaven. He passed away on February 11th, which had always been a very joyous day for me, but turned blue very fast. Taking you back in time for a brief history lesson, 2/11 is my parents wedding anniversary and the initial date Aaron and I had chosen for our anniversary also, eight years ago to the day I was baptized in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and met LeRoy for the very first time when he traveled 2 1/2 hours to support my decision of becoming a member of the Church! I loved him for this! He is an amazing man, and we love and miss him dearly, but also we KNOW he is perfect, can breathe easily, and he's now capable of running and playing without struggling. We cherish the knowledge we have gained through the Church and this has helped us very much. He is a great missionary and our guardian angel.
On a much happier note, we are living back in Wichita AGAIN!!! I absolutely LOVE school! I am scheduled to graduate next May! More great news... Aaron was accepted into the Physician Assistant program at WSU!- We are very excited! With that being said, Aaron will end his career as a firefighter/ EMT on June 3rd and will start PA school on the 6th! YIPPEE!- only 2 more years left of school! The kids love being back in Wichita and love the space we have to stretch out here! All of us miss Sunday meals at Grandma & Grandpa's house, our friends, and Bogey's, but luckily for us, Hutchinson is but just a short drive away!
Last weekend Aaron ran the half marathon in Wichita again, pics will be posted soon! Colin has taken up bike riding like a pro and is obsessed with Star Wars, Ella has become quite the singer and has a vivid imagination, Jackson is talking nonstop and still our monkey always climbing something, if you look quick enough you can often catch him on the ceiling!;) Well, I think I should probably sign out I have another post to do for my friend's craft blog, sharing some recipes (I have her fooled, she thinks I can cook/bake!)and then I have a haircut I need to rock out on my dollhead tonight before my little monkey wakes up (he has ear infections again:(.) So that's all she wrote for the night! Love y'all!!! Peace!!!

Life = Fantabulous!!!

Wednesday night the kiddos, Aaron, & I drove to Wichita to tour my school! I was a wee bit overwhelmed with anxiety with the thought of attending school again, however, after visiting I'm feeling nothing but joyous feelings! The annoying part of it all, however, school doesn't start until Oct.25th (which is forever far away,when I am elated about something I'm worse than a kid in a candy store!) -literally! Aaron is excited for me, even if it's only bc he wants more of a J.Crew style! I think the kiddos are even ready for Mommy to get away for awhile, but we'll see, only time will tell! So, for now, I'm going to go do a little more updating the design on my blog since the beautiful kiddos are asleep and I cannot handle anything any one way for very long. -I know I have some OCD issues, but that is how I roll! Good night!

Top 7 Reasons Why I LOVE My Mr. McKinney

As of the 9th of this month, My Mr. McKinney & I have been married for SEVEN years now! It is A-M-A-Z-ing to me that he still loves me! I am not an easy person to get along with, let alone live with! So here goes My top 7 list of reasons why I LOVE My Mr. McKinney!
1. He is beautiful, he's my personal Dean Cain without the dark haircolor (hehe!)
2. Aaron truly does love me, for me- even with all of my extra baby weight and terrible battle with post- partum depression.
3. My Mr. McKinney is a really hard worker, a firefighter for the City of Wichita for 24 hours at a time + he works on his off days from the fire department for my brother who has his own plumbing business.
4. He is finally listening to me and he's going back to school to become a PA!- I LOVE it when he takes my advice! ;)lol!!
5. My Mr. McKinney is being supportive of me in my decision to homeschool our children while supporting me while I go back to school!- which might I add I am super elated about!
6. He is a fantabulous father to our three beautiful children and husband to yours truly! ;)
and drumroll please... (as he asks what I'm doing, my reply: blogging, his reply: you can blog this!- what a pervert! JK!)
ok, back to the drumroll... bum bum bum bum... bum bum...bum bum... ...
7. Aaron is ALL mine! Yes, you read that right, ALL MINE! We are sealed in the temple for ALL ETERNITY!!!! WOOT WOOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ALL MINE!!!!!!!!!!
Thank you Aaron for loving me for who I am not what you might want me to be!!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU BUNCHES AND BUNCHES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We're back!

We're back, and I am going to be changing my blog soon so this becomes more of a blog that will travel through our adventures of homeschooling, our Church callings, hopefully me accomplishing my new body (well, me getting my old body back again! lol, Jackson's first year, and me going back to school. We'll see how this goes!

Sorry!!!!

Hello Everybody!!! I feel so bad I haven't posted anything for almost a year now. Our life has been very hectic and crazily full this past year, but I will be posting all of our pics and activities very soon! So please stay tuned!!! Love ya lots!

Jesus Wants Me For a Sunbeam

Jesus wants me for a Sunbeam to shine for Him each day, in every way try to please Him, at home, at school, at play! A Sunbeam, a Sunbeam, Jesus wants me for a Sunbeam! -This is one of our most beloved and treasured songs in our house these days now that we have a little Sunbeam of our own!

On the first Sunday in January of 2009 Colin became a Sunbeam. Despite his nervousness and unwillingness to leave his little sister, Ella in nursery all by herself! (So sweet!)It has now been a little longer than a month and the two kiddos do just great on "their own!" Honestly, I think Daddy was more nervous than anyone! lol- he had to work at the firestation so he missed out on the changing of classes. :( - To ease his worries and to prove that the kids and I could handle the change, we made a special trip to the firestation after church to see Daddy and let him in on all the fun we had!!!

Belated! - again!!!

So, here is another BELATED post from me! ;o) What's new, right!?! We have been quite busy with all of the hustle and bustle of the holiday spirit and magic! We hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving and a very Merry Christmas! We pray everyone has a Happy New Year in '09! Good luck with all of your resolutions! I promise to post more soon! Take care for now! Much love!